http://www.slideshare.net/adeadewusi/an-oily-affair

The Oily Affairs of a Profligate Nation

I have read and watched several arguments pervading the public domain since the announcement of the removal of the fuel subsidy. I have been very circumspect in pitching my tent during these turbulent times.  

However, it is clear that all Nigerians are justifiably angry. By Nigerians I refer to the majority of people who have their own hands in their own pockets! 

Despite the fervent uproar that heralded this unpopular  government policy,  some things have been achieved. What amazes me is the speed at which these two things have been achieved:

First, the truth is coming out concerning the mono-trade that props-up our nation. Veiled behind contrasting facts, figures and extrapolations is the truth. More people have come out with their own versions of the  real reason why Nigeria needs to stop a subsidy that  should not have existed in the first instance.

Second is that Nigerians have become more perceptive at seeing the big lie that has been sold to them for the past fifty years. 

The government has been a big lie, its policies a poignant reminder of the wickedness of man to man and its appetite for waste compares only to Usain Bolt’s abilities to break his own world records over and over again. Subsequent Nigerian governments have elevated corruption and wasteful spending to a new art form. No stable nation competes with us in this genre, we are record breakers!

Let us briefly examine the origins of the fuel subsidy, and the carnage of catastrophy that has followed. We discovered oil in the southern part of Nigeria and sited refineries in Warri, Port Harcourt and Kaduna. In typical Nigerian style, our refineries were left to deteriorate while Turn Around Maintenance contracts were constantly awarded to incompetent firms. 

Miraculously too, our leaders also forgot to build additional refineries to cater for the burgeoning population. Our three refineries were built when Nigeria’s population was about eighty million people. While we doubled in size, our leaders were more focused on lining their own pockets than planning for a growing population.

As far back as the Babangida years, Nigeria had been experiencing shortfalls between internally refined petroleum products and actual demand for petroleum products.  Professor Tam David West managed the challenge by exchanging crude oil for finished products. He devised a system where countries were paid in crude oil for refining petroleum products, ensuring that nobody made money from the situation.

This problem of lack of internal capacity to refine crude oil is perennial, just that the politicians took over and devised a clever way of making money from their own incompetence.

The politicians created a class of super rich Nigerians who became cohorts in funding elections and perpetuating corrupt people in government. How else can you explain the fact that everyone who has donated two hundred million naira to the presidential campaign fund in the past two elections are all major players in the oil sector? How would they be paid back? SUBSIDY! 

People like Aliko Dangote, Femi Otedola and Wale Tinubu all became purse keepers and financiers for the politicians, empowered and capable to provide cash for political conquest. Some of them barely existed ten years ago! The politicians neglected the refineries, did not build new ones and created the elaborate scheme of phantom subsidy in order to solve their own problems, not ours!

Like all businessmen, the “oil marketers” were quick to sense opportunity. Several of them set up accounts with banks to harness the business opportunity of subsidy, not petroleum products marketing. Sanusi Lamido Sanusi provides insight into these fraudulent dealings in his write up. This is a transcribed copy (in part) of his submission at the Town Hall meeting on deregulation of  refined petroleum products which was held on the twenty-second of December 2011:

“You establish an LC for importing 20,000MT of PMS and the PPPRA says this is at a landed cost of N145 for example per litre. So you know that for every litre in that vessel you will get at least N85 as subsidy. Now you have a number of "possiblities": 

1. You can off load 5,000 MT and bribe customs and other officials to sign papers confirming you offloaded 20k MT. Then do the same across the chain with a paper trail showing you delivered 20k MT to a tank farm, and maybe even that you transported it to Maiduguri entitling you to a share of the price equalization fund. Maybe for N20-N30 per litre youbribe all those who sign the papers. The 15k MT you take to Benin or Ghana or Cameroun and sell at market price thus makin an additional "profit" of N55/ltr on 15,000MT! 

2 you can just forge documents and have them stamped without bringing in anything and collect the subsidy-PPPRA pays based on DOCUMENTS. 

3 you can bring in the fuel, load on tankers, sell some at N65N some at 80 some at 100 some across the land borders. 

You can do all this and no one can catch it or prove it because somebody was paid to sign off on documentss. And with a high enough margin there is too much temptation to be resisted and firepower for bribing officials. 

When I spoke to the house of reps I told them why I was suspecting fraud. It starts from PPPRA "allocations" based on "capacity". You will find a company like Mobil with capacity for say 60,000 MT and a relatively unknown name with a capacity of say 90k MT. Red alert number 1. 

Although PPPRA is supposed to give license only to marketers with a national distribution network you see names of companies where you have never seen a filling station in their name.

I was a chief risk officer in UBA and in FBN for many years approving loans so I know the name of every big player in every industry that nigerian banks lend to as these are among the biggest banks in the country. I see names on the list I don't recognise either from portfolios. I looked at or industry studies over the years. Red alert number 2. 

I studied the papers presented to PPPRA in a short period in 2010 (I won't tell you how I got them!). And I was surprised that on some days over 10 vessels are said to have discharged cargo in lagos on the same day-clearly the same officers stamping and "verifying" that the vessels were SEEN. Is it really realistic that on the same day 13-15 vessels can discharge in Lagos? Red alert number 3. “

According to the same write up, Femi Otedola’s Zenon and AP owe the Nigerian banking system about 220 billion naira in bad loans that have been taken over by AMCON, yet he did not have stock of petroleum products worth a fraction of that amount. You can bet he also did not have the cash in his corporate accounts. More importantly, he could still afford to give the Jonathan/Sambo campaign organization 200 million naira during the election season.

I have taken time to quote the Governor of Nigeria’s Central Bank in order to show you, my reader, the sleaze that makes for an arresting Hollywood thriller. On all sides, you see subterfuge, greed and corruption. You see institutionalized  kleptomania across the value chain, oil marketers, port officials, PPPRA, DPR and bankers who knew the truth and never said it until now!

It is clear to me that the subsidy scheme was created and executed by the government to enrich their friends and themselves. It means the nation budgeted huge amounts of money which we knew was going to be pocketed by a few people.

Why is the Goodluck government removing the subsidy? Profligacy is not sustainable on the long run! They now want us to pay for their incompetence. It is clear that no official wants to let the truth out of its hiding place. We are broke! Our external reserve is down to 27 billion dollars from 80 billion when Obasanjo handed over. 

Our internal debt is 5 trillion naira. External debt is back to 35 billion dollars.  Excess crude oil account is down to zero. We are broke yet the only rich people in Nigeria are politicians and some pastors. Politicians who earn more than every other earthly government and pastors who collect earthly money, lay hands on and promise heavenly bliss to men of shady character. Some of these super rich pastors are not saying anything now. Some of them are speaking as a matter of expediency. Some of them have private jets with which to fly out of Nigeria. They share that same luxury with the  dirty politicians they bless and celebrate with front row seats in their churches.

We need to ask our government what they are getting paid for. Is it the national pride that we currently enjoy or our infrastructure that is out of this world? We still have polio in Nigeria in 2012. We have hospitals that are not fit to treat animals. No government primary school competes with a public school in South Africa. Our universities provide better criminals than scholars. We do not have roads. in the place of roads we have long stretches of death traps designed to keep the population in check through untimely death. We do not have electricity. We have lost our factories to Ghana. Just a few grumbling manufacturers remain, who are yet to get land in Ghana.

We have lost everything we met on the land. Cocoa, palm oil, groundnuts, cotton, cashew and rubber have been forgotten and are better produced by nations who came to learn from us. We have lost our moral compass, our society is fractured, our statehood is threatened. Our citizens are in all prisons around the world. Some of them prefer foreign prisons to Nigeria. Our passport is treated with disdain everywhere you present it. Why should our Senate Leader earn 600 million naira per annum? Why should our senators earn 30 million naira per month? Why should our National Assembly gulp 1.2 trillion naira per annum while we try to save 1.4 trillion from subsidy removal ? Why should our government be this big with special advisers on cassava and beans affairs? Do we need 52 ministers and 36 states? Do we need a Minister for Water Resources when 95 percent of Nigeria cannot recognize a water faucet? Why would our president spend close to a billion on food while close to eighty percent live on less than a dollar a day?  Why should he budget a billion for generators and diesel when he is urging us to believe in his power sector reform? Why does our President need  9 private jets? Why do our governors move around with twenty-vehicle convoys while David Cameron has just two vehicles and one outrider? 

Why should our politicians keep their salaries when Obama slashed his? Why should we continue to be wasteful when the handwriting on the wall says “danger”? Why should we believe this government when it says the subsidy gain will be properly reinvested? Despite my utmost respect for Christopher Kolade, I have this ominous feeling that he is being set up to be rubbished. Same for Alfa Belgore!

Labaran Maku must be suffering from foot and mouth disease if he really used that cavity to announce 1,600 buses as palliative measure for 170 million people. Lagbus has 500 buses. What impact will that make? You mean the government of Nigeria needs to subject her citizens to hardship in order to buy 1,600 buses. On the strength of the initial information on how the  savings will be invested, given by Labaran Maku and the minister for Labour,  the government is bereft of both ideas and dictionaries! 

To move Nigeria forward, we must do the following:

·    Demand more transparency from the government especially in oil dealings and allocations. Remember the way Okonjo Iweala was publishing the allocations to all tiers of government.

·   Demand immediate reduction of the size of this government and its wasteful ways.

·      Demand specific prioritized projects which should be tied to the subsidy savings (if we negotiate a reduction instead of outright reversal).

·      We need to demand same from our state governments, prune down the waste.

·      We need to ensure our protest is peaceful and organized to avoid loss of life.

·      We need to resist provocation and divisionist tendencies.

·    We need to pray for Nigeria. I still believe God can use this moment to make a change in Nigeria.  Pray that anyone who steals from Nigeria’s commonwealth will experience pain and sorrow. Pray for God to help us in the same way he intervened Abacha-wise.

·      Share additional information online, do not stop the flow of information. The more we know, the better we become.

Just an addendum, later today, I shall be publishing specific line  items from Nigeria's 2012 budget to expose the  financial recklessness of this administration that is asking Nigerians to sacrifice. Make sure you check in!

I have posted a new  entry on how our money is stolen through overblown and unrealistic budgets. I picked out line items from the budgetary allocations of the office of the Vice President in the 2012 budget. Please read that post. It makes interesting reading.

2011: EXPLOSIONS AND IMPLOSIONS IN NIGERIA

It is 2011, not news right? I guessed.

I share a healthy dose of the unfettered joy and hysteria that occasions the transition between two years but not the materialistic self-indulgence that now characterizes the celebration of both Christmas and the New Year. Everywhere in the world, retailers target and promote the hedonistic consumerist lifestyle that screams “buy, buy and buy”. My approach to the festivities has always been that of “contained optimism”. My birthday falls on the 4^th of January and birthdays for me are usually introspective. I usually reflect on the previous year and plan for the New Year. On my birthday, chances are that I would be moody than excited. I appreciate the fact that birthdays are yearly milestones but I have never believed in partying and celebration that accompanies birthdays. This also aligns with my view of Christmas and New Year celebrations. I have learnt to “count my days so that I might apply myself to wisdom”, after all the difference between one year and another is a second. Amidst all the frenetic prayers of the faithful every thirty first of December, I thank God for the gift of His protection over my life and another three hundred and sixty-five chances at making impact in my life and that of others and quietly start refining my action plan for the year.

I was already in church on the 31^st 2010 when I heard about the explosions in Abuja, the capital of Nigeria. As usual the details were scanty and casualty figures ranged from moderate to catastrophic. I left the main church auditorium almost delirious and sauntered into the restaurant in my church to satisfy the news hound in me. I quickly pieced together the facts of the matter. Revelers at the Mogadishu Barracks were jolted by explosions which killed four people on the spot and sent several people to the hospital with various degrees of burns and immeasurable trauma. This location, known to most people as the Abacha barracks was known for its bustling Mami Market which served deliciously spiced fish of various sizes with fries and bottled drinks of any kind. Abacha Barracks was the watering hole of choice for residents of Karu, Kubwa, Gykoyi, Nyanya, Idu and Karimu who would rather “recharge” in a watering hole than brave the intimidating traffic that builds up every evening on their way home.

The elitist nature of Abuja and the prohibitive cost of such liberties in the metropolis, the relative affordable pricing of the offerings in Abacha Barracks also attracted residents from Wuse, Garki, Gwarimpa and other areas of the Abuja metropolis. On several visits to Abuja, I have paid short visits to the Mami Market to buy their specialty; roasted fish and retire to my hotel room, “settle down” and do justice to the fish. The Mami market would remind any visitor of the resilience of the Nigerian family especially the military family. This watering hole was run exclusively by military wives and daughters of soldiers who needed to augment their financial realities and support their breadwinners. The sights and scents of the Mami market would delight any tourist who is interested in culinary adventurism. Fishes of different shapes and sizes were grilled in several open fires and served with several condiments and spices in large trays accompanied with very cold drinks. The market catered for the budget-conscious patron and the lavish-indulgent. Nicely-dressed men and women trooped in and enjoyed the delicacies without raising and eye-brow about the near-derelict state of the environment. It reminded me of Nigeria, yes Nigeria.

I have painted the picture of the environment in the Mogadishu Barracks in order to give my readers a lucid psychography to set a stage for several questions that stirred in my mind as I stood glued to the television and wondered: why would anyone want to bomb the Mami market and the Mogadishu Barracks? Why would anyone plant a bomb in a market operated by women and children? Who would have the temerity and fool-hardiness to plant a bomb in a barrack? What would anyone gain by inflicting such carnage on the country and fellow human beings? What does this portend for Nigeria and its future considering the imminence of elections? Why did the perpetrators of this act choose the date, 31^st December 2010?

The answer struck me a few minutes before midnight: 2010 was the year of explosions but 2011 shall be the year of implosions.

You will recall that the incident and frequency on bomb explosions in Nigeria was near zero if you e excluded the dastardly murder of Dele Giwa during the Babangida years. Bombs surfaced in the national consciousness of Nigeria again in the Yaradua era as the Niger Delta issue escalated and Nigeria watched as misguided miscreants seized control of a genuine cause and made businesses out of carnage and kidnapping. Under Jonathan Ebele Goodluck in 2010, we transitioned from militancy to full scale kidnapping for economic reasons and finally to indiscriminate use of bombs and incendiaries.

On the first of October, 2010 we witnessed the first set of explosions which brought national attention to the ineptitude of the security apparatus to deal with any form of organised, pre-meditated and co-coordinated attack. Our plethora of security agencies could not gather and share actionable intelligence to deter such a flagrant assault on the nation on her independence anniversary. The Independence Day bombing dented the image of Nigeria in the eyes of the international community and betrayed what discerning Nigerians had long suspected: that we do not have a president who could handle crisis! The president did not have the statesmanship required to handle a matter of such importance and expediency. He rushed to the defense of MEND and quickly invited MEND chieftains to Aso Rock to show solidarity with “our brother and president of Nigeria, Jonathan Goodluck”. How could you quickly exonerate a militant body that took responsibility for the bombing without the conclusion of preliminary investigations? The shoddy and pedestrian handling of this crisis called into question, the intelligence and competence of the aides of the President. Henry Okah and his brother were quickly arrested in South Africa and Nigeria and charged to court. A political adversary Raymond Dokpesi was summarily arrested, interrogated and inserted in to the plot. I am sure Henry Okah must be smiling somewhere in his cell now. While this script was playing out, more oil pipes were being blown up in the Niger Delta and more people were being kidnapped in the South East. It took a “crack” team of police and Army teams to liberate Abia from the grip of Osisikankwu, the kidnap king.

We must not forget the very peaceful waters of the Lagos port welcomed a seemingly innocuous ship which berthed in Nigeria without any fuss or incident. It took intelligence from the FBI to alert Nigerian security agencies that the ship had thirteen containers filled with rocket –propelled grenades, shells, guns and ammunitions that could overthrow the government in Benin, Liberia or Togo if put in the right hands. The Jury is still out on why Iran shipped this explosive cargo to Nigeria and who wanted to cause more explosions in Nigeria in 2010.

If the attempt to bring in military hardware was thwarted in Lagos, would-be perpetrators soon found other means of achieving explosions as the fragile peace in Jos was once-again interrupted by five explosions which killed and maimed many people. The saga of Jos remains a classic case of “how to ruin paradise”. The explosion in Jos occurred on the twenty-fourth of December 2010 while Christians were getting ready to attend church service marking Christmas Eve. While conspiracy theories and counter-theories were being advanced for the Jos bombings, a PDP aspirant for governorship in Bayelsa learnt an important lesson in politics when a bomb exploded at his rally venue: watch your back! If anyone thought this would be the end of explosions in 2010, all such hopes were dashed a few hours to the new year by the Abuja blasts.

As fervent prayers started an hour to midnight in my church on the thirty-first of December, my mind was confused. I listened to the cacophony of prayers assaulting my ears, people asking God for breakthroughs, upliftment, success, protection and appointments. I wondered if anyone here linked all of their requests to Nigeria and the survival of Nigeria; just as the Bible asks us to “pray for Jerusalem”. I was about giving up on praying when my pastor suddenly interjected: “we now have to pray for Nigeria, that Nigeria will survive and be a peaceful place for all of us to actualize our goals and aspirations”. I was dumbfounded that my pastor read my mind perfectly. He subsequently itemized other prayer points about Nigeria that gladdened my heart. When I finally had the opportunity to pray alone, I asked for God to replace explosions with implosions in Nigeria.

Guess what? I think my prayer was belated. He had started doing it in 2010. He will just finalise it in 2011.

We have had more bombings and explosions under the PDP-led government than under the numerous stints of the military. We have had more political assassinations under the PDP that we had during the 1966 coup and subsequent coups. Aside dying in office or in over-speeding official convoys, more PDP members have died from assassinations than from any political party in the history of Nigeria. There has been more violence in one PDP-controlled states that in all the other states put together. It is clear that the foundation of the PDP is deeply rooted in the ethos of the military founding fathers. The language of its principal officers typifies the military mentality. Such phrases as “do or die” and the “PDP must capture Lagos” tells you more about the thought process and actions of the party than any well-edited campaign advertisement. The flagrant abuse of power, disregard for the rule of law and thuggery exhibited by the PDP says more about the party manifesto than the allure of its umbrella. The incessant carpet-crossing of its members from one political party to the other in the face of adversity points to a total lack of ideology or core value. This is not to preclude that other political parties in Nigeria are better and have well-established ideologies or value. In reality, all political parties in Nigeria thrive on name-dropping an “Awolowo”, "Azikiwe" or promising the masses power, water and good roads.

If Nigeria must experience peace in 2011, the PDP will be the first element to implode. For Nigeria to increase instability in 2011, the hegemony of the behemoth Peoples Democratic Party must decrease and ultimately implode. And it is already happening.

Arguably the most credible face of the PDP in recent times in Nigeria has been Professor Dora Akunyili. She was the NAFDAC czar who never quite made the mark as Minister of information. Just before the year ran out, she dumped the PDP and joined APGA to pursue her senatorial ambition. This tells every analyst something: she has gauged the barometer of opinion in her constituency and noted that the PDP has not thrived because the Igbos have never benefitted under the PDP. Eastern arterial roads are clearly as bad as they were eleven years ago when the PDP assumed office. Selfish as her move may seem, it is a pragmatic-realist move that is ominous for all students of politics. PDP is going down.

The Special Adviser to the President on amnesty joined the shortlist of deserters when he joined the Labour party to contest the gubernatorial election in the President’s home state of Bayelsa. Although he has been tight-lipped on the reasons for his jumping ship, everyone thinks the squabbles in the PDP over presidential aspirant and other contests are death signs sign-posting the beginning of the end for the ruling party.

As the Kwara drama unfolds, I am sure that further implosions of the ruling party will follow a few things will happen in Nigeria that will ensure that Nigeria witnesses peace in 2011. That is my prayer!

THE NIGERIAN EXPERIMENT AT FIFTY

Everyone and every country celebrate birthdays. It is an occasion that brings the life in question into full retrospect, creating an opportunity to question the essence of the actions, choices, outcomes and consequences upon which the celebrant's waking moments have been spent. If this be, Nigeria offers itself as a critic's cadaver this time in history.

I have seen pictures of the moments of joy and euphoria that welcomed the lowering of the Union Jack and the hosting of the Nigerian Flag. I have read some of the flowery and grandiose speeches that heralded the birth of Nigeria. I have also followed closely as Nigeria crawled into statehood but refused to stride into its potential as the Giant of Africa, choosing to remain a toddler in all spheres of development after fifty arduous years . I have participated in the trials and tribulations of Nigeria, experiencing my own unfair share of disappointment, indignation and sometimes; annoyance at the state of Nigeria. I have had cause to question God's fairness in his decision to send to planet earth via Island Maternity Hospital in Lagos Island instead of John Hopkins! I am sure I am not the only one. Many an Andrew actioned their lethargy at the Nigerian Experiment and bade good bye to our land. They chose to give up on the "Nigerian Experiment". Yes, I know you are wondering why I keep using the cliche.

I remember my chemistry laboratory very well although it was a waste of time! I had already decided on my bouquet of ordinary level subjects in class two. I recall the experiments with all kinds of chemicals, reagents and powders. I remember my first titration class and my inability to control the pipette. Every chemist knows that if you cannot control the pipette, your experiment is doomed due to your failure to control the volume of whatever liquid you had in the pipette. I was not the only one who could not get it right in my chemistry laboratory. We all got varying degrees of success and ended up with different results. To save face, we all gave our solutions (the results of our individual and collective ineptitude) various names. We invented funky names for our failures and felt good with ourselves. I coined the term "demolution" for my inadvertent solution while someone called his own.................wait for it......Nigeria.

Nigeria is a British experiment that poured different ethnic groups into a fictitious entity, attempted to use different versions of legalisms (constitutions) to forge (yoke really) them together. The aim was to cover their failure at herding and governing black nations who had varying degrees of sophistication and organisation in ruling themselves so they lumped them together under on phony geographical entity and awarded independence. Every student of Nigerian history knows that some parts of Nigeria had been independent and had highly developed political institutions before the white man came.

It was clear as at 1957 that Nigeria was an experiment in the making. We had mostly regional leaders and no national leader. Our intellectuals who were vying for national positions all named themselves as the leaders of their ethnic nations: Saurdauna, Zik and Awo. They were all reagents trying to dominate the same solution. Other ethnic nationalities in the same experiment just kept quiet and waited for a time when constant temperature and pressure would create a deafening explosion but I rest that for now. Lest I forget, even the name Nigeria was not original and neither was Miss Shaw! You already had a Niger Republic and you sleepily affix "ia" to it and proclaim to your beau that you had solved his insomnia. It is clear to me that some of the problems we face fifty years on were clearly evident in the pangs of parturition that brought forth Nigeria. It was a political experiment, given a random name and pushed on her merry jolly way.

As at 1960, we had huge gulfs in mind-set, expectations, goals and sensibilities. The opiate tendencies of Independence kept us going while different regions kept their separate agendas to themselves and as oil had boosted our confidence, we lapped up the goodwill of the international community and deluded ourselves: All Was Well! It took the coup of 1966 to let jolt everyone to the reality of different reagents and combustible elements occupying space and time in the same test tube. Form that fateful day in 1966, every single decision and action of the Nigeria government has been tainted with the poison of ethnicity. Subsequent military coups followed this pattern of wrestling power from one party and giving it to another party in the experiment. Even when the coup plotters had no such intentions, the public foisted these insinuations on their actions. This military experiments continued until we finally brought another element with the military DNA (Obasanjo) to power in 1999 too see if he could catalyse the development of a homogeneous Nigeria and create a stable solution. We also introduced a coagulant: Peoples Democratic Party. The attendant explosion will be examined tomorrow.

BEATING STRESS:HANDS DOWN

BEATING STRESS: HANDS DOWN

Work is a very difficult thing to contemplate. In this fast-moving rat race that our world has become, it is becoming more Herculean to look at work through the eyes of a philosopher. Work is becoming life and life, separate and divorced from work is almost inconceivable. We work to live and live to work.

Many a high-flying, A-band, top performing executive is achieving and surpassing the targets at work, gathering plaudits and accolades from bosses and colleagues and moving rapidly up the corporate ladder. Yes, doing good honest work and earning a commensurate pile of dough is not a bad idea.

The big question is: “AT WHAT COST?”

Red Bull, Power Horse, Coffee, Kola nuts are the fuel on which some of today’s super performance is combusted. Sleep deprivation (burning the mid night oil), overwork and other health-draining tactics are being used by executives to meet never-ending targets and goals. Some of you take your work home!

Consider the wonderful nation that we live in and the contributory effect some daily event have on our lives. You probably drive to work for two hours and drive home for three hours in thick traffic congestion, smoke and noise, only to get home and realize that PHCN has done what they really know how to do: deny us of power. So you put on your own generator just like several other people in your neigbourhood and donate your own quota of noise and effluence to the environment. No wander the earth is warming up!

After taking your bath, you lie down on your bed to sleep, but morpheus denies you its potent dose. You cannot sleep. You roll all over the bed and think through the night only to hear the cock crow: morning has come. Off you go, to work, again! How rested are you? If you live in Alakuko, Alagbado, Ipaja and some of these places, I bet you wake up at four-thirty, just to make it to work on time.

It does not take long for the emotional reserves to drain away when they are not replenished and recharged. The end result is stress and its attendant ailments. Stress is real and it kills.

Many fatalities have been occasioned by the silent ominous diseases caused by stress: high blood pressure, heart diseases, cholesterol, obesity, miscarriages, skin lesions, chronic fatigue, dizziness and other health dysfunctions. How can we beat stress hands down?

We are starting a gathering of professionals that will use art forms: music, dance, drama, literature and poetry, history and folklore, painting, speech making, stand up comic, debating and lectures to relief stress. You will learn to play that musical instrument you’ve always wanted to strum! Imagine a collective of people from different backgrounds, coming together to have fun, laugh, play, joke and learn while releasing the pent-up dioxins of stress in their bodies. We want to use art for stress theraphy.

Imagine rediscovering your youth, playing Baroka in Wole Soyinka’s “Lion and the Jewel”, singing “E ba mi so fun sisi yen ko ma I lo o” in very deep but off-key baritone voice and still getting applause because we came to have fun, not to dethrone Victor Olaiya. Imagine delivering a lecture to us on the cultural heritage of your village. Imagine reliving the debating contest you had in your primary school. Imagine being the lead singer in a band despite your deep conviction that a frog sings better than you.
We will provide a warm and conducive environment for clean and practical fun. There will be ample opportunity to laugh at ourselves, our predicament as a nation and humanity.

We will make “fools” of ourselves but we will have fun and we will beat stress, hands down!

We want to start this in the first quarter of 2008. If you want to join us, please text your full name to 0807555 7555 and let us start this war against stress!